Shirley Grande Carpenter was born May 10, 1935 in Saratoga Springs, New York and died peacefully in her home in Bentley Village Nov. 10. She was the middle of five children born to Madeline Cook Grande and Willard Joseph Grande.
Shirley was educated in Saratoga Springs, where she graduated from high school in three years, after which she took a post-graduate year at Emma Willard in Troy, New York. She was enrolled as a freshman at Vassar College in Poughkeepsie, New York when, in February 1954, she went on a road trip to Dartmouth Winter Carnival and met her husband-to-be Jim Carpenter, then a senior at Williams College. They met again, by accident, at RPI in Troy. They married in Saratoga Springs in June 1955, just after Shirley turned 20. Their first child was born in May 1956.
After raising her three children, Shirley returned to Monmouth College in West Long Branch where she earned a Bachelor of Arts in education in 1972, graduating with straight As. She was a third-grade teacher in the Fair Haven public school system for 14 years; the same school system in which her granddaughter is now a teacher.
In 1986 she got her real estate license and was a top realtor with McCue Realty in Rumson until her retirement in 2000.
Shirley was a longtime member of Navesink Country Club, Seabright Beach Club, and the Shrewsbury Sailing and Yacht Club. Despite not being a Vassar College graduate, she was president of the Jersey Shore Vassar Club for many years.
Shirley was quiet, modest and highly capable and could be counted on to do a top-notch job, all the while trying to stay out of the spotlight. She was a remarkable woman and will be greatly missed by her family, friends and especially her husband of 65 years.
According to her wishes, there will be no services. She will be buried in Williamstown, Massachusetts next summer, where she and Jim will rest for eternity “neath the shadow of the hills.”
Shirley is survived by her husband Jim, her daughter Candy DeFalco (Gene), her daughter Connie Deans (Michael duPont), her son Jim Jr. (Kristie Juster), six grandchildren, four great-grandchildren and countless people whose lives she touched.
The article originally appeared in the November 19 – 25, 2020 print edition of The Two River Times.
