By Jamie Jablonowski, MPH, BSN, RN, CPH
Men are often expected to remain strong and push through challenges, quietly carrying the weight of their responsibilities at home and at work. With a difficult economy and a shifting domestic landscape, men are facing new challenges with less social support than previous generations. This, coupled with the silent pressure to keep going, can leave little room to pause, reflect or ask for help.
According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), men account for nearly 80% of all suicide deaths; 60% of those men had no documented mental health condition. Men are four times as likely to die by suicide than women, yet much less likely to reach out for help.
November is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month, and one local man is on a mission to create a space for men to find peace.
Using Yoga to Reduce Stress
Christian Valeriani owns EvenFlow Yoga in Fair Haven. Valeriani spent seven years in Wall Street sales before deciding to pursue his purpose: serving others. Finding relief from daily stressors through yoga, Valeriani hopes others can find support in his studio as well. As Monmouth County’s only male studio owner and one of its few male yoga teachers, Valeriani strives to create a place for men to connect with themselves and each other.
Valeriani acknowledges the challenges men face in expressing their emotions. “Most men are taught that you don’t share your feelings, that you put your head down, work hard and dig your heels in,” he said. He believes most men feel the spectrum of emotions women feel, but lack the ability or outlets to express their feelings, thus holding them in.
Unlike competitive sports or weightlifting, which many men gravitate toward, yoga offers something different: a space to release the tension from your tissues that Valeriani believes can eventually lead to disease. “If there’s no tool to manage the stress, and we’re not taught those tools, that ultimately ends up in some kind of disease.”
He describes exercise as external, while yoga is internal. “I believe in the spiritual practice of yoga, and the spiritual practice of yoga has played a critical role in literally saving my life.”
Addressing Mental Health Issues
Rehan Aziz, M.D., a psychiatrist at Hackensack Meridian Health, agrees that men face unique challenges, especially in recent years, as community for them has declined.
“Men and women face many of the same mental health conditions, but some of the risks fall harder on men,” Aziz said. “Men unfortunately die by suicide at four times the rate of women and they have higher rates of alcohol and drug problems.” He added that men are also less likely to see a doctor or therapist for mental health conditions.
Depression in men often looks different than the familiar picture of sadness and tears. Aziz explains that men are more likely to become irritable or be angry, use alcohol or substances, or spend more time at work. In addition, men may snap more easily, have a shorter temper or spend more time on screens doomscrolling.
If someone is experiencing moderate or severe symptoms, Aziz said that getting a referral for a doctor or therapist is critical. “If any person is having any thoughts at all of not living, that’s really an emergency signal,” he warned. “That’s almost like having a heart attack and you want to get help immediately.”
Individuals having thoughts of harming themselves can visit the emergency department or call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.
Chronic stress can also present differently in men. “Some men often show stress through bodies and behavior rather than through their words,” Aziz said. Men may have more physical complaints than mood complaints, such as fatigue, changes in sleep patterns or increased complaints of headaches or stomach issues. Some men may pull away from family or work longer hours.
According to Aziz, stress in the short term can lead to poor sleep, trouble focusing, problems at work, problems at home, decreased sex drive and less patience with other people. Over a period of years, however, the consequences of chronic stress can lead to high blood pressure, heart issues, weight gain, substance abuse and strained relationships, marriages and friendships.
For family and friends concerned about a loved one’s mental health, Aziz suggests noticing changes in behavior. “Note changes such as withdrawal, irritability, more drinking, more risk-taking, losing interest in the things that he used to enjoy.”
When choosing an opportune time to approach a loved one about your concerns, Aziz said to pick “a calm moment, often while doing something side by side.” He describes men as more goal-oriented, so choosing an activity such as walking, sports or driving can create a calm space to address the conversation.
“Men need connection as much as anyone,” Aziz said. He advises that community is one of the strongest protections for mental health. “There are studies that have shown that people with strong social ties live longer and have lower rates of depression, heart disease and dementia.” Men tend to bond through shared experiences, such as sports leagues, faith groups, and volunteering. For a man who is feeling lonely or depressed, joining one of these activities can be life-changing.
Aziz agrees with Valeriani that yoga and meditation can offer significant benefits for men. “Yoga and meditation can play similar roles because often these happen in group settings and it can be a way for a man to join a yoga or meditation group, which can then be part of a community that they’re in,” he said. He added that yoga and mindfulness can help ease symptoms of depression, anxiety and stress.
Overcoming the Hesitation
At EvenFlow Yoga, Valeriani acknowledges the hesitation many men feel walking through the door for the first time, tentative about their lack of flexibility. He strives to create an environment where men grow physically and spiritually. “You’ll become more flexible, you’ll reduce your risk of injury, and you’ll feel more balanced emotionally, mentally and physically, and you can prolong your life.” He said the benefits extend beyond that to improving creativity and helping men in the workplace. He even noted that former NBA championship-winning Chicago Bulls coach Phil Jackson used yoga to improve performance.
For those who do not know where to begin, Valeriani encourages men to take that first step, no matter how small. “The journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step,” Valeriani said, quoting an ancient Chinese proverb. “Any amount in that right direction is a victory.”
Echoing this approach, Aziz encourages men to take that first step toward professional resources and community.
“We really only have one life to live, and it’s a short life, unfortunately, and nobody should live that life suffering.”
Mental Health Resources
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
Call or text 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org for 24/7/365 free and confidential support.
New Jersey Mental Health Cares
Call 866-202-HELP (4357)
NAMI HelpLine
Call 800-950-6264 or text NAMI to 62640 for free mental health information and support from the National Alliance on Mental Illness (available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. ET)
The article originally appeared in the November 5 – 11, 2026 print edition of The Two River Times.
