By Elizabeth Wulfhorst
The demands of summer are few for a lot of kids: sleep late, swim all day, catch fireflies, hang out with friends, binge the latest streaming sensation.
But when the calendar page flips to September, stresses for children and teens can skyrocket.
Students have homework, tests, sports, clubs and part-time jobs, all pressures that can lead to anxiety and mental as well as physical health issues. Add navigating the school social scene to the mix and sometimes school can seem overwhelming.
According to the Centers for Disease Control website, the percentage of children ages 6 to 17 who have been diagnosed with either anxiety or depression has almost doubled since 2003, to nearly 10 percent.
The first few weeks back at school can be the most difficult. Tracy R. Handerhan, the principal at Rumson-Fair Haven Regional High School said the students are “buzzing with excitement” at all the new experiences when school starts. “With all of the ‘newness,’ it behooves educators and parents to recognize new experiences and transitions can be very stressful times,” she said.
Renuka Verma, M.D., the program director and section chief for pediatric infectious disease at The Unterberg Children’s Hospital at Monmouth Medical Center, said back-to-school anxiety can manifest itself differently in different age groups.
Children under age 10 may be fussier, cry more and cling to a parent. They may complain of stomachaches or headaches during the week but be fine on the weekends, she said, something doctors see a lot more in September than other times of the year.
As children get older, the same issues – fear about a new teacher, worry about making friends –become even more important, said Verma, and systemic symptoms like abdominal pain, poor appetite and insomnia can become more serious.
Handerhan said high school freshmen are especially vulnerable to the changes in their environment and the pitfalls of being in a new school. She cited many examples of the pressures they may face, including getting to
class on time, opening a combination lock, learning the school’s layout,
joining clubs, and even finding new friends and a seat at the lunch table.
“Sometimes, the culmination of seemingly small things can sneak up on students – especially freshmen,” Handerhan said.
All students are susceptible to stress, though. Handerhan said the factors she considers most egregious for high schoolers are unrealistic time management, sleep deprivation, the desire to be “perfect,” digital hyper-connectivity and substance use, in the forms of vaping, alcohol and drugs.
Unrealistic time management or “overscheduling” goes hand-in-hand with lack of sleep. Many students take rigorous academic courses which require a lot of work outside the classroom. “When athletics, arts, clubs, volunteering, job and/or family commitments are factored in,” Handerhan said, “there is just not enough time for students to do their best.” And getting lower than expected grades is a major source of stress for students. Handerhan finds students will often “borrow” time from sleep to finish their other work, a practice she does not condone.
“In my experience,” Handerhan said, “I find most students are not getting enough sleep and the sleep deprivation compounds mental health concerns.”
Social media apps popular with students and adults alike can also add to stress. “Many students appear to have a Pavlovian response” to notifications from these applications, Handerhan said. “Not only is this type of app distracting during the school day and homework time, studies show that it is anxiety producing,” she added. And substance use can also manifest during adolescence. “It is particularly worrisome when students experiencing social anxiety self-medicate with alcohol or drugs,” Handerhan said.
Many schools like Rumson-Fair Haven have programs in place to help students deal with the pressures of high school life. RFH holds both student and parent events throughout the year to make them aware of available resources and the health curriculum addresses substance use and mental health concerns. Handerhan said the RFH health curricula “was recently revised to heighten awareness of mental health concerns with emphasis on seeking help,” something every school in New Jersey will be required to do for all kindergarten through 12th-grade students by fall 2020, thanks to a recent bill passed in the state Assembly requiring mental health education as part of health and physical education classes.
“Student wellness is a top priority at RFH,” said Handerhan. Students can request counseling services or be referred by their peers, faculty, parents and other adults who made deem it necessary. The RFH counseling team works individually and in small groups with students regarding social anxiety and other wellness concerns. Through the Civic Leadership Series developed by the RFH School Climate team, students attend programs about anxiety, depression, nutrition and chemical health, among other wellness issues.
Last year the school held two “Digital Detox Days” during which students did not use their phones and computers were used only as necessary for academics.
“At every opportunity we try to stress that making and learning from mistakes is a critical component in the learning process,” said Handerhan. “I think it is beneficial for our students to hear this message from multiple factions of our greater community.”
But combatting the stresses that occur when summer ends isn’t easy or quick, said Erin Avery, owner of Avery Educational Resources, a comprehensive school consulting organization in Monmouth County. “Transitioning back to cerebral demands requires patience.”
Avery suggested creating a calendar and anticipating “high demand” weeks during the school year. She also recommended adjusting a child’s sleep schedule before school starts to account for early rising times.
Verma emphasized the importance of the parents’ role in helping a student deal with anxiety and developing a routine to deal with the pressures of returning to school.
“Prepare children ahead of time before the summer ends,” she said. “Talk about all the new things they will face. Let them know everyone else is afraid, too.”
For younger children, Verma also suggested approach the teacher ahead of time to make a connection and foster a resource in the classroom.
For any age group, Verma said making a routine is paramount. “Ritual gives them a sense of stability. They know they have something familiar to come home to,” she said.
She recommends keeping that expectation of routine with children as they get older. “It’s all about expectation,” Verma said. “This is the parents’ role and it becomes very important for the parent to be the example.” Set the expectation for dinnertime and bedtime and lead by example, she said.
With teenagers, Verma said talking helps a lot, even if they say they don’t want to. “Always be on talking terms with your kids. Ask, ‘How was your day?’ Always ask,” she said. While they may not answer you every day, if you keep the routine going and keep that line of communication open with your teenager, you give them the space to tell you things when they need to, she said.
And Verma said at every age, one need is universal: love. Everyone, including teenagers, needs love, so don’t be afraid to give it, she said, in the form of hugs and kisses and communication.
